Give us an introduction on who you are and what you do.
My name is Simone, 28 years old, living in Amsterdam and I am the co-founder of the sexual wellness brand Aia* Intimacy. My brother Hugo and I started the brand together 2 years ago. Most people are surprised when they hear it is a family business, but for us, it doesn’t feel like a weird thing to do. We like to do things a bit differently out of the beaten path.
What prompted you to start Aia* in the first place?
I have been very passionate about living a natural and sustainable lifestyle, incorporating these values into every aspect of my daily life. Transitioning to eco-friendly alternatives, I began by swapping out conventional products in my kitchen and bathroom, extending to items in my bedroom. I was already using lubricant for a while and I discovered that many contained chemical ingredients and were packaged in plastic, so I opted for coconut oil as a solution. Unfortunately, I soon realized it wasn't without its drawbacks—it's incompatible with latex condoms and disrupts the vulva's pH balance. I started to look at other available bands, but I realized that the selection of lubricants in the drugstores was very disappointing. Everything seemed so intimidating, with intense flames, purple colors, and flavors like passion fruit.
We wanted to find a solution for that! So we decided to create our own product and design a matching bottle, that also looks aesthetically pleasing. Something you can put on your bedstand instead of hidden away. The sexual wellness industry is quite outdated in that regard, though it is already starting to catch up! We felt it was time for a breath of fresh air.
Our lube is made from 100% natural ingredients and is in a glass bottle – unlike many other lubricants.
A lot of what you do have to do with promoting for others to be intimate, do you prioritize your own pleasure? and how?
Yes, it is very important to prioritize your own pleasure. Unfortunately, we are still living in a society where 90% of men are always coming during hetero sex and only 30% of the women. I am a big advocate of closing the orgasm gap, and I hope we can higher the female percentage by sharing more information and awareness.
Achieving orgasm during partnered sex can still be a challenge for many vulva owners, myself included. However, I find it important to maintain open communication about my difficulties and am not hesitant to take matters into my own hands when needed (100% success rate guaranteed). For women, there can be so many factors (stress, hormones) involved why one time it flows easier, than another time.
I find it very important to take ownership of your pleasure. For some women, it can be done with their hands; for others, a Satisfyer does the job.
Have you ever faced a time where you struggled with your own intimacy, and how'd you overcome it?
When I lost my virginity at 18 I was definitely struggling with having sex, because it was always painful in the first 1-2 years. I lacked knowledge about the importance of taking things slow and easing into penetrative sex, which made it not so enjoyable. Luckily when I met other partners I experienced how it also could feel nice and amazing, which was a revelation.
What was the most recent time you stepped out of your comfort zone and tried something new regarding intimacy.
I am just fresh into a new relationship and it has been great to explore intimacy on a deeper level. Whereas at the beginning of every new relationship, everything is hot and steamy, being tuned in to each other is also an amazing feeling. We are also beginning to discover non-monogamy and how we would like to explore with an extra person or a couple. To be continued..
What do you think we need to do as a society to help everyone feel free to pursue their desires.
I believe that shame surrounding sex and sexuality is one of the biggest hindrances in your sex life, and it's so unnecessary. You don't have to be ashamed of your fantasies and who you are. You can't control or distort your fantasies. It can be quite vulnerable and intimate to open up about them, but if you ignore your fantasies, you're essentially ignoring a part of yourself. They belong to you, and they're a part of who you are. And that's what makes it so exciting because everyone is different!
If you had to give a piece of advice for someone who is scared to act on something they want to explore intimately, what would you say?
Don’t feel ashamed of your sexuality and just do it! If you are scared of something, it is always good to conquer your fears and grow as a person.
